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OOC: it's ok

IC: She was hesitant a little, but felt nothing wrong with the force here. "I think so, I mean I am pretty sure, I black out usually after the pain." She said. She knew her conscious mind was pushed back for reasons she still didn't know when she lost control. The event at the cantina was no exception, she didn't remember what had happened. She did remember going completely unconscious, that mystery was still out of her reach. After all she had not talked to Rani since it happened. She did remember a brief period of pain beyond anything she had felt before. "I think it was Kenobi and you together, I've only heard rumors of his powers." She said admitting she really knew nothing beyond that.

"Death!!" Lanya exclaimed in anger almost. "Why must that woman be everywhere I go? Damn it she is nothing more than a pest." She said still angry. Her pain surged with her anger, but she quieted it. Closing her eyes she calmed herself. "I am sorry she annoys me so, I still don't understand why she is so great or why you would want that (points at the holocron). After all you said you knew little about her, so why would you care what is in that?" She asked. It was a far question, it didn't seem right that anyone would want something that another had made who they knew little about.

OOC: poking you myself ;p

She calmed a little, but was unsatisfied with that answer. "What do you want me to do?" Lanya asked. She wasn't sure what else to tell her master as far as her pain went. It just seemed to happen for her when she got near another force user and it seemed that the more powerful they were the more pain came. For a moment it made her wonder about those she had pasted. Shacking her head at that thought she waited for Rani to answer.

Rani's words weren't very comforting, but she had to do something to prevent the cantina from happening again. Lanya closed her eyes; she could feel the pain at the level it had been before. Time and control allowed her pain to be tolerable by Rani. By more than just Rani or any other force user made it difficult to control. She was uncertain how she was supposed to allow more force within without having the Pain rise to cause problems. It was a dilemma that stopped her progress, if she let go her control the pain would surge, if she didn't she couldn't go within the force to learn more control.

Her eyes remained closed as she tried to decide what to do. Taking a deep breath as she made her decision, it was going to hurt. Lanya let go instantly she fell to the ground on her knees, her eyes flicked black. The force flow as her pain surged with it. The walls seemed to crack as she hurt. It was unsure how long she could take this; Lanya hadn't really pushed the limits of her pain when the force flowed within. Usually she was rendered unconscious or disabled by Ysalamiri, she wasn't even sure if the temple or the sith could take her powers.

The walls stopped as she put an end to what was going on by regaining the control she had had, nothing was changed only her mind. It was uncertainty that had stopped her from pushing farther. She really didn't want to hurt anyone or destroy anything for making her choice. Her eyes met Rani for a moment; it seemed to her that he was simply waiting for her to make up her mind. Quickly her eyes fell to the floor in shame that she felt from changing her mind. 'You need to do this.' She thought. Her thoughts betrayed what she needed to do not what she felt however. She simply couldn't allow what happened before to happen again. A sigh fell from her, taking a few heavy breaths, she let go again.

It hurt once more as she allowed the force inside, this time it seemed as though the vases were cracking as her eyes turned black. The force ran through her like her pain did, even at times it felt like the force fueled her pain. It was why to many force users near her caused her powers to 'blow' as it were. Once again like normal Lanya wanted to scream from the pain she felt, it wasn't as extreme as it had been in her most recent encounter. So the scream wouldn't have been so loud, that was if she could scream. For some odd reason she couldn't express the amount of pain she was in when this loss of control happened. Most likely it was because of the force that stopped her. It seemed like it wasn't simply just a fuel for the pain, but also stopped any normal expression she had.

Lanya had to push hard against her pain without letting the force fuel it to much, this meant pushing against what her mind wanted to feel. It was an extremely hard task to block out any amount of pain much less a great amount quickly. To do so she placed a thought in her mind and had to focus hard on this thought alone. This was also not easy, Lanya's mind wondered a lot, she was after all still young. However her thought helped greatly, as she focused the pain dwindled more than it had ever been. It still remained however, she tried to focus hard on her thought. The pain was still great for her, she let go of her thought, but the pain stayed at that level.

Her eyes had returned normal and the vases no longer seemed to break. She could feel the difference within, however pain still remained. Lanya's face told that tale when they seemed sad. She had hoped that the pain would be gone, it was simply diminished by a seemingly small amount. Very slowly she got up, she was a wobbly and exhausted. She looked at Rani. "It's never going away is it?" She said. Lanya seemed to know the answer to that before she said it. It seemed the only real question was why it wouldn't go away, something Rani probably didn't even know the answer to. One person probably did, but Lanya's mother wasn't talking, well sense anyway.

Lanya took the syringe, she eyed it carefully. She wasn't sure if it was going to do anything at all, carefully though she stuck it in her arm. For a moment her eyes closed as she opened them. "it's gone." she thought. It seemed as though the pain killer had done the job, at least for now. She was uncertain that she liked the idea of drugs in her system or her using them. It felt good though that she had no pain and could feel the force. "I don't like it though." She said. Lanya had to express what she felt about the drug.

Her body didn't like it though after time. The force surged the pain ten fold, she fell back to her knees. The pain pushed enough against her that her eyes didn't even flicker to black fast enough before the ground seemed to shake. The force ran through her like flood gates were forced open. It cause more discomfort and pain than was usual for her. She wanted to scream more, but couldn't she was stopped for some reason or another once again. The force seemed to be in greater control this time as it surged pain through her body. Almost she felt helpless against the pain and the pressure of the force, almost. 'Get up you weak pathetic excuse for a Sith.' A thought came to her. This wasn't her thought. 'You heard me.' Another thought. Not wanting confusion to go with her pain and pressure Lanya pushed back with all her might. Concentrating on the force she turned it to build dams like she had before within herself, it had helped before controling the pain. She only hoped that this time she the force would get under her control as well. The pain continued to fight even as Lanya used force into help her build the dams within her body to help calm the pain.

The pain was apparent on her face, but as it was so to was the fact that it was slow to be extinguished this time. Lanya bent the force slowly to push against her pain as she continued to build the dams. It was an extremely long hard push when the force wanted to continue to put pressure against her. She struggled at times when the pain continued to what to surge as the force wanted to continue it's press against her body. Her body was starting to grow weary, but she continue to try and gain control of what was going on. Finally in one big final push against the pain she managed to get it contained back to it's original level, then she let the force go.